Ooger and Uugg Take a Bath
My name be Uugg.
Er… This be Ooger. Ooger draw himself.
Ooger draw me too, but Uugg embarrassed by Ooger’s drawing. It have me just taking bite of Mammoth with mouth open and look funny.
Ooger is brother. He older than me by one Mammoth year. He is strong, but like to draw. Uugg strong too, but prefer to watch Ooger draw. Sometimes me draw. When Uugg try to draw, me draw something like this:
Ooger think this drawing ugly, but me not so sure. Zoogg like drawing so much, he give me whole Mammoth leg for it. This is Zoogg with Mammoth leg and drawing:
Mammoth leg is leg Zoogg give me for drawing. Then Ooger draw Uugg when me taking bite from leg.
Zoogg is strange person. He like to eat plants like Mammoth. He eat Mammoth too, but he like plants also. Ooger and me not like plants. They are taste bad. But if you like plants too, Zoogg eat these ones:
Like me said, Zoogg is strange person.
Zoogg also like water. But he not just like it for drinking, he like it for jumping in! When he come out, Zoogg smell bad. Not smell like dirt and sweat like Ooger and me. Ooger and Uugg smell good. When we try tell Zoogg he smell bad, he just say, “Urrrr.”
Me suppose this reason enough for Zoogg, but he still not smell good.
Ooger reply to “Urrrr” with “Unnggghh!” which make our bellies shake. It also make our mouths turn up and teeth show and us both have to say “Huhuhuhuhuhuh!” Ooger cannot stop saying “Huhuhuhuhuhuh!” but me stop after first one. Zoogg not say it at all. His mouth not turn up, and belly not shake.
This is picture of Ooger saying “Huhuhuhuhuhuh!”:
Me guess Zoogg not get what Ooger say.
Then Zoogg say “Grraaarg!” which make Ooger’s belly stop shaking. Zoogg is more strong than Ooger, but he not draw, which mean me get Mammoth leg. Zoogg leave then, so me and Ooger go hunt for Mammoth.
We are hunting for long time when Ooger point and say “Urrng!” Me look and see Mammoth by self.
“Uugg!” say Ooger. He say “Uugg, urrng!” and point to Mammoth. Ooger walk quiet toward Mammoth. But me follow him more quiet because Ooger keep smacking his mouth like this: “Smack! Slurk! Shmlack!”
Then me know Ooger is hungry because Ooger smack mouth.
We not walk quiet enough, because Mammoth see us and walk backward. Ooger and me walk fast to catch up. Then Mammoth walk backward more. Then Ooger and me walk more fast until Mammoth stop and look at us. Mammoth look at Ooger and then Mammoth look at Uugg. Mammoth look like this:
Then me see behind Mammoth, and it look like this:
Why Mammoth stop?
Me not know either.
But Ooger and Uugg, we just keep walking fast toward Mammoth. Mammoth just look at us.
Then Ooger cannot wait more longer (he still smacking mouth, “Smack! Slurk! Shmlack!”) and he raise spear. Me raise spear too.
Mammoth grab Ooger with arm-face and throw.
Mammoth throw me too, but first me get spear in Mammoth leg.
After Mammoth throw Ooger and Uugg, me figure out why Mammoth not keep going earlier… there is water and it make Mammoth smell bad if Mammoth keep going.
“Thunk!” the sound spear make when hit dirt. “Sploosh!” the sound Ooger and me make when get jumped in water. Ooger and me not like get jumped in water. We not smell so good no more after. Not like dirt and sweat. Ooger hold nose and try not smell. Me just roll in dirt.
Uugg not show close drawing of me rolling in dirt because me is embarrassed to smell bad. But here is Ooger holding nose:
Ooger and me walk from Mammoth hunt back to cave. Ooger hold nose whole way.
When Zoogg see us, Zoogg’s teeth show and Zoogg’s mouth turn up. Then his belly start shaking. Soon Zoogg is having to say “Huhuhuhuhuhuh!”
Me not know why he say “Huhuhuhuhuhuh!” because Zoogg smell bad too, and Ooger not say “Unnggghh!” like last time.
Like me said… Zoogg is strange person. He eat plants and jump in water and say “Huhuhuhuhuhuh!” when Ooger not even say “Unnggghh!”
And Zoogg smell bad too.
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This entry was posted on March 8, 2014 by The Janitor. It was filed under Comedy, Fiction, Ooger and Uugg and was tagged with author, Caveman, Cavemen, childlike, Childlike Author, Comedy, Mammoth, Neanderthal, Ooger and Uugg, Strange Person, Zoogg.