Every Childlike Author needs a Playground.

The Childlike Author Feels… Lustful

Lustful [luhst-fuh l]
– having strong sexual desires; lecherous; libidinous.

This is something that most normal people feel, but that many avoid admitting. Probably because they think if they do admit it, it will somehow make them seem shallow, or less credible, or less respectable, or in general just a bad person.

I, however, am here to tell you that if you’ve experienced lust, that doesn’t make you a bad person. Because that’s biology talkin’, trying to tell to you that your species will die out if you don’t procreate.

First off, your species will not die out if you don’t procreate because plenty of other people are doing a whole lot of procreation, so much so that there are approximately four births per second.

Compared to less than two deaths per second, our little human race is gaining a net 213,120 individuals every day, and a total of 371,520 newborns.

That’s a lot.

CLICK to Enlarge Image

CLICK to Enlarge Image

But consider this: The women giving birth each second cannot give birth for another nine months because of the unavoidable gestational period. This means that for nine month intervals, every newborn that pops out is a child of a unique mother! That’s a total of 100,310,400 unique mothers in only three quarters of a year.*

And for every mother, you gotta have a father.

So double it to 200,620,800.**

That’s a lot of people who’ve experienced lust. And not only did they experience it, but they acted on it.

Except it doesn’t even begin to add up to the real figure.

So let’s add another statistic… the abortion statistic.

The World Health Organization reports that there are 40-50 million abortions every year, but we’ll split the difference to keep it simple and say it’s 45 million. Gestational period is three quarters of a year, so that gives us 33.75 million abortions every nine months. Since having an abortion within a nine month period means you can’t give birth to a living child within that same nine month period (because gestation), we can assume there is no set overlap between the women giving birth and the women choosing abortion. But for every aborted baby, there’s gotta be a father as well, so double it to 67.5 million.†

Which puts the number of people who have experienced and then acted on their lust at 268,120,800.

Small number compared to the seven billion people on the planet, right? Maybe, but it’s only ten million shy of twice—twice!—the entire population of Russia.

Continuing onwards, the CIA World Factbook gives the total world fertility rate as 2.45 children per woman. Do you know what that means? It means that about every two years, effectively 100,310,400 unique mothers are done bearing children, and 100,310,400 completely new and unique mothers have taken their place.

And since we always double that number because of the fathers, we can add 200,620,800 to our number of action-taking lusters every two years.

So if you’re eighteen, and you’ve been sexually aware of other people since you were twelve, guess how many people have acted on their lust in that time period?

1.2 BILLION. ††

We’re talking one in every seven people on the planet. Yet those numbers are only based on how many babies are made from a lustful interaction (in this case sexual intercourse resulting in pregnancy), and doesn’t even account for how many people have acted on lust without incurring a pregnancy. It doesn’t account for the number of men and women who’ve done everything but literal sex either, and it certainly doesn’t account for those who’ve done nothing except imagine what another person looks like when they’re naked. So we can probably venture another, higher guess on how many people have experienced lust regardless of whether they took measurable action.

My guess is 74 percent of the population, or roughly 5.18 billion, or three out of every four people on the planet, and pretty much every person over fourteen years old.‡

In other words, you’re not alone. It’s okay to admit that you’ve felt lust. It doesn’t make you a bad person. In fact, it makes you a normal person, and really, problems only arise when lust is allowed to take over your behavior inappropriately. These are the same inappropriate behaviors that gave lust a bad name in the first place, so if you want to avoid looking bad, then you’ll want to avoid the bad behavior. What’s bad behavior, you ask? Things like viewing pornography at work, sending or receiving naughty pictures to or from your friends or coworkers, indecent or public exposure, sexual harassment, rape, sexual intercourse without proper commitment or proper protection or both… The list could keep going and going, so I’ll leave it at that—although I will mention that most major religions frown upon premarital sex (premarital anything, really) and consider such inappropriate.

And in case you were wondering, yes, I lust. I am not immune to biological urges. If I see an attractive person, I may find myself thinking about them in a more than platonic and less than fully clothed fashion.

The bad thing is that at certain times we’ve all let lust override good judgment, which is all too human and not at all commendable. I guess what I’m suggesting is that we try our best to control our lust rather than allowing it to control us. Because if it’s controlling us, that’s bad. If anything controls us, it’s bad for the simple reason that we are OUT OF CONTROL.

We should all be masters of our own actions and our own fates.

Have you ever felt lustful? Share your lust below or by clicking HERE.

*Unless you’re accounting for twins, or triplets, quadruplets, etc. That being said, the incidence rates for twins and triplets only account for about 1 in 80 and 1 in 6400 births respectively. For multiple births higher than triplets, the rate of incidence is so small that it can be considered negligible. Taken all together, multiple births only account for about 1.27% of all daily births, or approximately 4700 daily. For a nine month period, that’s 1,269,000 twins and triplets, including about 140 sets of quadruplets, quintuplets, etc.

Identical Triplets. Even more rare than heterozygotic triplets.

Identical Triplets. Even more rare than heterozygotic triplets.

**This does not account for pregnancies from in vitro fertilization, pregnancies from rape, or fathers who conceive multiple children from multiple women within a nine month period. These combined numbers are likely very small, but who knows about that last category…

†Since carrying a child to term limits isn’t required for an abortion, there are probably some women who have multiple abortions within a nine month period. But I can’t imagine that number is very high, and I’m betting it’s low enough to disregard.

††Adding abortion rates would make this number even higher, except the statistical difficulties are beyond my feeble abilities. But since I didn’t account for the death rate either, I’m going to call it even.

‡If we assume those who have not experienced puberty have never experienced lust, and also assume that this particular demographic is the population aged 0-14 years, then this means 26 percent of the world population has not experienced lust and 74 percent have. Numbers are taken from the CIA World Factbook, which gives an age breakdown of global population.

Have you ever felt lustful? Share your lust below or by clicking HERE.


5 responses

  1. That’s a lot of babies!


    April 14, 2014 at 4:44 pm

    • It’s hard to imagine, isn’t it? Statistics can be so mind-boggling at times…


      April 15, 2014 at 2:12 pm

  2. Pingback: The Childlike Author Feels… Mystified | The Playground

  3. Alex Hurst

    I will do my part about the whole over-population thing by not having kids. 😛 I get all my “must become a mother” hormones out at work teaching five year olds, so usually when I’m feeling lustful, it’s all for my own gain, haha.

    Nice post, as usual. 🙂


    April 20, 2014 at 8:51 am

    • Ooh… Yeah. A horde of five year olds is probably a superb means of discouraging reproductive tendencies. Can’t fault anyone for lust, either, since it’s so universal.


      April 20, 2014 at 8:57 pm

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